Reprinted with Permission by Currents Magazine | JAN 2025| Cornelius, NC

By Mickey Dunaway

Since this piece reflects forward on the upcoming twelve months of 2026, keep the idea of New Year resolutions in your mind as you read. I begin, as I usually do, with a personal story—this one about my upbringing. 

I was born and lived for 59 of my 79 years in the deep South. I have lived in the Tar Heel State for the last 20 years, which is definitely not in the deep-hot-as-an-oven South. The deep South is South Carolina, Georgia, Alabama, Mississippi, and Louisiana. Florida is geographically in the South, but with so many Yankees taking over cities and elections, I excluded it from the criteria for “deep South.” You see, I am a flatlander, so Tennessee and North Carolina were omitted even though I am in awe of the mountains—rather like I was by the tall buildings, the one time I went to New York City. 

I grew up as a Bible-believing Baptist Alabamian, who, as an elementary student, stood before our congregation on a Sunday night and recited—in order—every book of the Bible!  I was raised from birth on the Southern values of Hospitality & Kindness, Politeness and Manners, Family and Community, Faith, Honor and Honesty, Family Reputation, Self-Reliance, and Pride of Learning.

“Yes ma’am” and “No ma’am” were nonnegotiable when speaking to adults, from kinfolks to strangers—no matter their race, religion, or station in life, even if they were Yankees—just kidding. Those Southern values for living with other people continue to reside in me today—in my children and grandchildren.

I also grew up in a South without diversity. The only black person I really knew was “Mr. Slim,” my Daddy’s good friend when they worked together as mechanics at McConnell Cadillac in Mobile. I have written before about the lifelong image of Mr. Slim standing in the back of the white-filled Wilmer First Baptist Church. That image at my Daddy’s funeral is as significant today as it was in June 1995

In the span of my lifetime, I have seen monumental positive societal changes in the South and in our country. However—and that’s a big however—those changes have regressed almost beyond recognition. We are angry over the most incidental things. We can’t talk politics at the dinner table. When we disagree, we don’t talk it out; we don’t laugh it out; we often shoot it out.  Were I European, I would be hesitant to bring my family to many parts of my beloved America. 

“Really?” You ask. 

Do you ever feel hesitant to attend an activity at night in the heart of Charlotte because it feels too dangerous? It was not this way when I arrived twenty years ago. Watch the local evening news, especially on Mondays. Then watch the national news to hear the same events echoed across our nation and in our schools and houses of government, and tell me I am wrong.

Sadly, I see no path forward for our country in 2026 that does not resolutely include Family, Hospitality, Kindness, Politeness, Manners, Family, Faith, Honesty and Honor, Self-Reliance, Community, and Love of Learning and Work at the heart of any path we take. 

Of these values, I believe that Honor and Honesty are at their heart. We must admit that we have hurt and been hurt. We have accused falsely and been falsely accused. We do not really know what motivates our neighbor’s actions because we have not asked, for fear of hearing something with which we might disagree. What a stupid reason not to talk to each other.

To be honest, really honest, we must trust and be trusted in turn. It is trust that inspires me to be honest and to put aside the hurt I have experienced before, and not to fear stepping out in faith in my relationships with others. And it is this honesty, based on trust, that builds bridges to the past and the future – the ability to look positively forward without looking back with regret at the faults we have overcome to reach where we are right now. 

The trust we need is not possible without forgiveness. Not the I-will-forgive-but-I-damn-sure-will-not-forget-kind of forgiveness, but the I-will-forget-forgiveness because I trust you. Unless this happens, there will never be the reconciliation our country desperately needs and deserves. Without this true forgiveness, we have only empty political apologies, as worthless as political promises. 

Resolve to let us forgive ourselves, our loved ones, our neighbors, those we disagree with, and even our enemies. And let us move forward in truth, honesty, and love as the Almighty intends for our world. 

*****

“To Err is Human. To Forgive is Divine.” -Alexander Pope, An Essay on Criticism, 1711